I, Claudia: the memoir of Frank's forgotten sister
by Cececat
Summary: The story of our favorite sweet transvestite and his servants through the eyes of his unpopular sister Claudia. Somehow she manages to survive through their mother's strange reign, the failed mission to Earth, and a time when a commoner ruled. Partially inspired by Robert Graves' "I, Claudius". (Please Read & Review!)
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own T _he Rocky Horror Picture Show_**

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 **A/N: This story is very symbolic. The character Claudia represents me in a number of ways. Her career as writer is a reference to my attempts at writing fanfiction. Some (though _not_ all) of the various original characters that appear throughout symbolize real people known by me. They're mostly just fanfic-related people.**

 **Literally, it's a story about Frank and company through the eyes of his little sister. Figuratively, it's Cececat's memoir of her time spent writing fanfiction (but not M. L.'s story of all her life). And it's an apology for my increasingly bad - and unpopular - work. Often I wish the brief popularity I earned with that oddity A Sci-Fi Fan's Adventure could be recreated. Alas, it never will be! It was oddly unique and strangely innocent... very much like RHPS itself, if I may be bold enough to say so.**

 **This is heavily inspired by both I, Claudius by Robert Graves and Lives of the Caesars by Suetonius. I reread parts of the latter's descriptions of Gaius Caligula for inspiration when it comes to things involving Frank. The overall style is that of a shorter, simplified version of I, Claudius. Especially the fact that it's written in English by an alien as I, Claudius was (in-universe) written in Greek by a Roman. The reasoning for this differs, of course, between the two.**

 **This chapter is the prologue and therefore not written like a story. It's a messy attempt at introducing characters and ideas important later... and to explain why the character Claudia wrote this book.**

 **Also... this takes place is the same 'world' as anything by "Gaius Cececatus Felix".**

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My name is Dulcibella Claudia, and I've lived a fascinating life.

You may know that I am the younger sister of famous crown prince Gaius Dulcibellus (son of Queen Dulcibella Livia) - often known as Dr. Frank N. Furter, a Scientist. You may also know that I became queen in later life because I outlived many more obvious candidates for the job. Or you may not, for I've written this in a language foreign to my own planet but well-known elsewhere. That would be an Earth-tongue called English. That I learned originally from a six-(Earth)month stay there that ended with my brother's death.

Anyway, I've decided to write the story of my life. Though it's more of a book about the three rulers preceding me and related persons. It's a quite colorful tale. Full of theatrically. Yet it still means something, it's still important. That's why it's written in English. I want only the worthy people to read it. Those of my planet with the patience to learn a primitive tongue from an obscure and distant place surely deserve a good story.

The secondary system of dates used is that used by Earthlings in this current age. I've added them in half for fun and half to make things more understandable in sections mentioning the Earth Mission. Since our world has a different year-length (they've got about 19 less days and things called leap years) the dates won't work out exactly. I'll try my best to explain when needed. Though the Earthling calendar is wonderfully organized season-wise it's not very pretty number-wise. Anyway, ages of people and such are rendered in both systems. And they said Prince Frank's Mission to Earth (in 1974 EY, which was about 1853 to us) was useless!

As you've surely noticed my life has been colorful and influenced by many odd experiences. I shall try to recall as much as possible for this. A number of my letters have been taken out of storage in the hope that reading them will remind me of things that happened years ago. It's amazing what rereading long-forgotten correspondences with older friends can tell you. Already I've read quite a bit of what I wrote to a Ms. Kitty Blofir and the many replies of hers. Not to mention stories I began and half finished, or complete tales I kept original drafts of. Though they probably won't show up in this book.

There's something I'd better mention! The game might as well be up! Many stories I have written, all published under the name Valeria Caecelia. I'm sure many guessed at this. Only a few knew, at least. One of those is my second (and current, at the time of this writing) spouse. This book really does spill almost every secret.

Speaking of secrets, many believed that I was insane in some way. My entire family is less stable than a three-legged horse. As the Earthlings sometimes say: "insanity doesn't run in the family, it gallops." Of course my brother Frank was a total wacko. It's just that I'm not good at hiding my issues as he. The troubles proper members of the family all have are useful for a person living in such a mad place as the palace. Lack of empathy makes death sentences easier to declare. Belief that you're a long-dead leader and similar delusions of grandeur help one cope with the job, too.

Going through phases that're gleeful and manic, and then suddenly becoming painfully depressed isn't any use. Nor are more-than-occasional descents into depression caused by actual happenings rather than a disorder. Though the wild mood swings I once was cursed with are something more common in rulers. This means I was insane by both my family's standards and the general medical professional community's standards. Most are only mad according to the latter.

All of that strangeness - and many other things - shall here be explained in relatively chronological order. Hopefully this will both entertain and educate the few who read it.

My brother Frank was born Currianus 9th, 1847 (sometime in 1944 EY). Our mother Dulcibella famously left him in the care of nurses mere days after his birth and went back to the party-hosting expected of a ruler. Three of our years and eight of our months after this (Hartlianus 9th, 1850) I was born. That would be circa 1946 EY. Because our year is 16 months (all exactly 24 days) my half-birthday is his birthday. This was an odd fact our mother often found amusing in later years. I think she saw it as an omen that meant I was equally important to my better-liked brother. Mother was very superstitious and had a personal team of psychics of various kinds that she often consulted. Ghosts are known to be real (thanks to researchers such as Dr. Venkmanus) and it's thought by many that Gods rule from some undiscovered star system far beyond our humble galaxy of Transylvania and Earth's galaxy. And our more open-minded polytheism inherited from our explorer ancestors is one reason we're better off than modern Earth in my eyes. But sometimes Mother went a little far with things and used religion as an excuse for stricter rules. At least some of her helped keep me from dying under mysterious circumstances like many court outcasts.

My Father, the King Drusus, died soon after I was conceived. Some people think my biological father was my mother's political advisor Lucius. They also say she poisoned Drusus. We do properly know that Lucius married her when I was three. One of my earliest memories was attending the ceremony. He was never an actual ruler in any way because of his lack of royal blood.

All this scandal made it even better that servants raised her children.

Practically from the moment I was born I was considered somewhat pretty. When my "odd behaviors" became more obvious my long curly hair and wide brown eyes were seen as my best traits - or, to some people, the only 'pros' to my existence. This is sort of unfortunate for one living in the Dulcibella Livia-era royal court. All were expected to be attractive physically and charming in manner. I never did well at public events and was left out of such things starting at the early age of six. Probably not by coincidence, they properly banned me from events just after I'd just been sent to and (after a month) brought home. This was when they began giving me medicines that helped suppress my issues. They actually do help me. I often wonder why I was banned from official public appearances and many events right when I was properly fixed. Presumably because everyone likes Frank better and they often forget about me.

Both Frank and I lived our early years in the care of nurses or nannies. Most memorable - and most durable - of these fine people was a widowed woman named Marcella Aelia. We called this lady Nona. She had long gray hair that she refused to dye (like most women did) and a no-nonsense attitude. Her greatest flaw was the desperate belief that even my fiendish brother had enough good in him to be worth it. At least she had more sense the most people. This meant she lived through dangerous court scandals and such. As far as I know Nona is still alive, living in the countryside with her three daughters and their respective spouses. Perhaps I should write to her some time. Though if I learn she has died I'll never stop mourning her. That woman is wonderful.

Anyone willing to put up with Frank for very long - which was a very short list that mostly included fools, family, and people like Nona - is wonderful. From the day he was born he was trouble. Though he could also appear to be a cute child or, later, a charming young man. It was hard for people to be mad at him. This made me hate him. The few people who could bring themselves to punish that boy were Nona, Mother, and the captain of the palace guard.

Since my mother Dulcibella became less and less important as time went on perhaps I'll give a description of life during her reign. Her era was repressed, old-fashioned, and lacked in our government's usual decadence. Sexual promiscuity was frowned upon for the first time in many centuries. Religion and superstition returned to daily life, thanks to her strangely intense interests in such things. Perhaps this is why my brother turned out so strange. Growing up in an environment so different from the rest of our history wasn't good for a potential future ruler. The various households he eventually controlled were all dangerously decadent in the view of both the old-fashioned and the young rebels. We shall get to all that later...

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	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own The Rocky Horror Picture Show**

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 **A/N: Here's part two. It's more of a proper story than the previous chapter. Hopefully it's good enough. There's the first mention of Magenta and Riff. Also, Lucius Dominus Crassus is Lord De'Lordy. "Dominus" means "lord/master" and "Crassus" basically means 'fatso'. His sister Domina Lucretilla is named after Lucretia of Roman myth because of what happens to her. Lucretia's basically the reason Rome isn't allowed to have kings (dictators like Julius Caesar don't count, it's complicated).**

 **WARNING: I should mention that Frank is said to have raped someone in this chapter. Said victim later kills herself. You could probably skip past that part though it's somewhat important to his character. I probably won't change the rating to M since it's not graphic/shown.**

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Oh, the teen years. When one is allowed to – or at least wants to – first engage in activities that are sometimes heard through adult's bedroom doors late at night. Such a time is very rebellious for people of any planet (just ask my current spouse, a foreigner). This time of life begins when one starts being interested in certain things and (legally speaking) ends with one's first marriage.

My brother's never-broken habit of using people for his own pleasure - even if it ruined their life - became obvious when he was sixteen and I was merely thirteen. The year would've been 1863. It was a rainy day at the countryside villa we children (meaning Frank, various noblechildren, and I) spent most of our time at. Nona was busy making a snack for us all at the time and our tutor had left for the day. It was a rare moment where the lot of us were without supervision. Being teenagers we should've been responsible.

Alas, some of us weren't.

There was a girl of about 15 named Domina Lucretilla. Her family was somewhat poor for one of noble blood. Though her elder brother Lucius Dominus Crassus did often swear that he'd redeem them all later. Anyway... she was very pretty. Not to mention terribly innocent. Her hair was long, blonde, and curly. Those eyes of hers were a lovely clear blue. When the attempted seduction began she was reading a classic work of poetry.

"Lu, are you busy this evening?" my brother whispered in her ear.

She responded in the positive. Apparently she had to go to dinner with her friends that night. Frank didn't like this and he was in a bad mood anyway. So, before any of us could stop him, he dragged her off into the maze of hedges and draped vines that most of the villa's gardens consisted of.

Soon enough a shrill scream alerted everyone of her capture. By the time me found them he'd already finished with her. This being the surprisingly conservative (by our standards) reign of our mother Dulcibella Livia, she'd been a virgin. When found she was in shock and seemingly unable to move or understand anyone's attempts to help her.

After the villa's private doctor saw to her various wounds we were all sworn to secrecy on pain of death. Nobody was to speak of it. That was the last time I saw her and those empty, lifeless eyes. Her parents were quietly notified and she sent to their house. With her went her Lucius Dominus Crassus, meaning her brother, and all of their servants. It was a very hushed-up affair. Even my brother - for once - seemed a bit horrified. Things got worse when it was discovered she'd killed herself with a knife. It was very old fashioned of her to use such a weapon. Usually if someone was to be killed a laserbeam gun or a lasersword would be the weapon of choice. So perhaps there was some symbolism to the suicide of Domina Lucretilla. An insult to the modern world and it's corruptions?

The moment her corpse was found Lucius Dominus swore to avenge her death. From that day he became more and more bitter. Of course, Dulcibella Livia still couldn't believe that her dear son Frankie hurt anyone. So there wasn't any sort of investigation even after the suicide.

After that my brother decided that he would persuade people into doing what he wanted them to, not attack them violently. It was more of challenge to him. Not to mention that there was less trouble afterwards. Those politely seduced were more likely to return to his bed than those violently violated.

His first victim of this sort was a lovely commoner named Lenora. Apparently she bore him a daughter called Fay. So little is documented of the lower classes that I couldn't find out much more about either of them. At one point I heard the girl had been abandoned to a family on Earth, though such rumors are all but impossible to confirm.

On a fine afternoon, not long after that nasty incident with Lucretilla, a girl named Cassandra (of the esteemed Lovittus family) had just begun talking to me. Nobody ever did that. Though Cassandra wasn't an ordinary girl. For one thing her manner of dress was eccentric. On Earth she would've been shunned. Here, at least, nobody cared that much.

"How are you, miss?" she asked.

"Alright," I replied dully.

She gestured to a paper in my hand and asked: "What's that?"

"A story. I like writing, you see. And reading all sorts of books... even fragmented things by Pergot. And I _adore_ epic mythology. Such as the Rohopish Saga as recorded by Brianillus. I'm into The Classics, I suppose."

Cassandra laughed awkwardly. "I'm not much into classics. Have you read any Quintillia M.? She wrote the Diary series not too long ago. I find that fascinating."

"I've read that series," I admitted. "Though I dislike how many people rip off bits of that work. It's annoying! Everyone does that, even C. L. Lovittus."

When I said that I'd forgotten that C. L. Lovittus was a relative of Lovitta Cassandra's (obviously). To insult someone's family is to insult them. Often I've had trouble hiding my stronger opinions. At least this wasn't as bad as it could be... or so I then thought.

Cassandra's face became quite red, she seemed about to speak, and then she stormed off. My chance at making a friend was ruined.

Later we became friends. This was partially caused by her admitting a fascination with classic writer-poet Brianillus. In fact, Cassandra knew everything there was to know about his life (though little about his actual work). She also researched the lives of those close to him.

"But we can't be sure about it all. Little information is available to us since there was less recording of things back then," she once told me.

When a Holoflick adaption of his Rohopish Saga was made she also dutifully researched the actors. One was a woman named Quinntia Patricina. That woman was ever so beautiful looking. Despite being about thirty at the time the adaption was filmed she seemed very young and glamorous to us. And she really was. Even all these years later she's still somehow beautiful (though clearly older). Though Cassandra always seemed more interested in Laurilla - another of the film's actresses. This perplexed me for I truly adored Quinntia but found Laurilla too strange. She spoke in an artificial alien-ish accent, like the sort you hear in cheap holoflicks about Earthlings invading, and looked sort of strange in my opinion. Still, Lovittia Cassandra had something of a crush on her. I admittedly was highly fond of the character played by Laurilla - I wrote that into an annotation of my novel _Castle(less) Life_ , in fact - in that Holoflick adaption. She was the most likable person in the story. Though when it came to looks I indeed preferred Quinntia Patricina and her character. Not to mention Ms. Quinntia's acting skill. The many expressions of hers made the adaption seem like something of a silentflick. It was both over-acted and realistic. Then there's her laugh. She's got a distinct laugh that's very memorable and very jovial. One reason I so dearly wish to meet her is to see if that laugh could also be heard in real life. It seemed like her 'real' personality would be just as wonderful as her fictional ones.

It was around this time that I - then just 16 - wrote a strange story that borrowed many of the characters from Rohopish. This was called _Adventures of a Fan_. Technically my sudden creation of literature was fueled by falling madly in love with a happily married woman named Anya. Because I was part of the royal family and she a commoner in a stable relationship to a young man of her class mentioning my feelings to her wouldn't be right. So I somehow wrote them into a story. A story I thought dreadful, in fact.

Though I did post it on a Holoweb forum for amateur writers. To my shock it was very well received. I do think that this nonsense was one of the best things I wrote. Even compared to my more recent work - especially compared to my more recent work. It was both nearly-perfect and improvised. If only I could recreate that success. Alas, that's impossible. Something about that was special. A state of mind that cannot be revisited. Like childhood. No matter how much you try to be the lively little thing you once were, the cold feelings that later took you away from all that won't go away. So I will never write something like that again. Though I might write an equal in popularity - which I doubt - nothing will ever be like it.

Because of this forum I met someone called Kitty Blofir. She'd only written one thing for that place but I somehow found her very good to talk to. Well, write to.

On our planet virtually everyone can be sexually attracted (or in love with) to anyone. That's the normal way of going about things. But at that point I'd only liked born females. Yes, there were other smaller crushes besides Anya and my favorite actress Quinntia Patricina. I kept this a secret for fear of being mocked. Many years late I fell for and married a man, so my fears have gone. Still, I hate to mention that old worry of mine. What if I only like one sort of person? How would I have lived with that? Though few people have that 'problem' it seems to run in families. I learned that many years later when studying Earthling genetics vs. Transylvanian genetics. That's something my brother was actually interested in and a major part of a required class in the course we both took so we could go on the famous expedition to Earth. Though I'll get to all that later.

Ms. Blofir often helped cheer me up. Though sometimes we spoke of meaningless things. The letters we exchanged can now be read as a diary of mine. Perhaps I shall copy some into this book...

" _Dear Claudia,_

 _As I often say, it's not really wrong that you only like girls. I remember freaking out when I was your age. But you'll fine. Especially with everyone being as accepting as they are these days._

 _On a perfectly unrelated note I've just discovered a friend of mine knows Quinntia Patricina. Sort of. You know how actors sign Holoflick posters for fans sometimes? My friend works at a meeting hall where such events happen and somehow managed to get a comlink code from Quinntia. Anyway, Quinntia Patricina is apparently very sweet. She says 'how extraordinary' when something interesting happens or people say odd things she can't think of a polite response to._

 _Even days later I'm still very excited. You're a fan of her too, so surely you understand._

My reply was rather childish:

 _"Dear Ms. Blofir,_

 _You sort of know Quinntia!? Oh, I'd probably do anything - even something very stupid - to meet her. Sometimes I real hate this restricted life I live. Yeah, my brother can get away with some pretty messed-up stuff. But I haven't got his charm. If I ran off in the hope of meeting an actress I adore I'd be in trouble. And she'd probably think me mad. Still, I wish I could meet her. More than anything!_

 _From, Claudia_ "

There's some of the earliest letters.

As you probably realize I was - and am - a huge fan of Quinntia Patricina. Still I haven't met her. With all the mad things that happened, which you shall soon read of, I had no time for conventions. Summoning her to court sounds creepy. One day I hope to befriend her. That day probably won't ever come.

While I was doing all that my brother was trying to become a scientist. This involved him actually working for once. Though he hardly did any serious work. Much of his time was spent in fishnets and corsets at a nightclub near his university. Somehow he managed to earn a Ph.D. at a reputed university despite (probably) doing no work...

Also at that time a young soldier not much older than I was becoming ambitious. Probably not by coincidence he attended the same university as my brother. His name was Seianus Vitus Riff Raff. That nickname was earned by his reputation for being a troublemaker. I knew his little sister Vita Magenta - she was one of my few personal servants. That odd young woman often borrowed the various accents of previous employers. It was sort of sweet. When she was 16 and I 14 we became something like friends. This meant she never got in trouble with me. I'd never punish her. Not only was she shockingly understanding, she also was a trustable friend. I trusted her even more than Kitty Blofir. And anyone willing to befriend me was a person to keep around.

Often we spoke freely... especially of her brother.

"He doesn't mean any harm," she once explained.

"So he doesn't mean any harm, but he's still attempting to be as powerful as my brother...?"

She sighed wearily. "Miss, he thinks it's wrong that people rule by blood. Why shouldn't he be powerful like you're family. Zat really isn't fair, you must admit."

"That's stupid. We're in charge. That stupid boy should go kill himself or perhaps I should crucify him. You're all so stupid!" I replied.

This bizarre, petty comment didn't offend Magenta at all. She realized - even before I did - that I wasn't myself. It was a symptom of some sort, a result of my illness. The court doctor had prescribed something to give me when I went into those violent-worded fits of mine. It caused slight dizziness for a while but at least it helped. All cures are like that. They both help and hurt. It's a balance that's needed.

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In case anybody's wondering...

Anya is supposed to be like Anna. Anya's husband and friends are Anna's friends and my classmates in general. Flora (she's in the next chapters) symbolizes school/responsibility. Her marriage to Claudia is like the metaphorical chains that force me to be a part of mainstream culture and keep me from bring truly free. Free to find myself a place to belong and make my life worthwhile. Claudia being married to Flora is a requirement like school. Something needed for life according to cultural convention. Something not actually required for existing and that doesn't do much good.

Frank usually represents my own brother, who's much too successful in science/mathematics. Though the nasty things Frank does aren't things my brother would ever do. I truly envy that kid's success and his unnatural charm... which is sort of how Claudia is about Frank. I also wish he was less arrogant. He's somewhat mentally ill, too (or perhaps high functioning autistic, I can't remember), but the resulting behaviors are somehow 'useful' in the eyes of current western society so people ignore that fact. My brother is more like the traditional version of a mad scientist than Frank... with his habit of avoiding people, fascination with thunderstorms, lack of interest in romance/friendship, and love of taking electronic things apart. And he's got an "Igor" called Hugo - like how Frank has Riff - who acts as an assistant of sorts during various projects/schemes. Like Riff, Hugo is jealous of his "Master ". Riff envies power while Hugo envies (perceived) cleverness. Unlike Riff, Hugo is technically equal in "power" to his master... though he doesn't always realize that. I'm thinking of showing the early stages of Riff and Frank's relationship as being like the current friendship between my brother and Hugo.

Magenta symbolizes RHPS fandom and all the good it has done. Though she's probably also going to end up as a foil to Claudia. Both have issues, but Magenta's are more external. They're both quiet, sometimes bluntly truthful, sarcastic, a bit odd, and they despise Frank. But Magenta has external struggles such as prejudice thanks to her love life and later abuse from her "Master". Claudia fights troubles inside her own mind, troubles nobody can truly see... troubles that aren't so tangible and are 'cured' by mere guesswork. That's how I feel. Often I wish I were a character in a RHPS story living at the castle with Frank and company. It would be like a never ending RHPS midnight showing in the best way. Yeah, Frank really scares me and the castle is pretty creepy. Though if I were such a character it would be pointless for the narrative to give me a mental illness since it would distract from everyone else's weirdness and make things somewhat unpleasant. So the issues with my life would be outside of my mind and I'd seem odd only in the 'proper' ways.

Now we're really off topic!

The 'Rohopish' epic is very clearly RHPS. Quinntia Patricina is Patricia Quinn with a different name on a different planet. All that nonsense about Claudia wanting to meet Quinntia is just me wanting to meet Ms Quinn. Like Claudia, I want to see if she's as nice/fun as I assume. Unlike Claudia I also want to teach her something by conversing with her. Yeah... right now one of my greatest wishes is too meet my favorite actress and get her to learn her cool things by talking (probably about history). Though she probably already knows all about history and movies and everything. Ah! That's silly and off-topic. Laurilla is Little Nell ('Laurilla' basically meaning Little Laura in Latin, and Laura Campbell being Little Nell's actual name).

Most obvious of all: Claudia's stories are stand-ins for my fanfics. The names are pretty big hints as to which is which, though the descriptions should also help you figure it out.

I know that this is rather self-centered for a fanfic. But I needed to write it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own _The Rocky Horror Picture Show_**

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 **A/N: Two reviews! Thank you so very much! I'd thought my stories and RHPS fanfiction had been forgotten. Hopefully more fans will return to this site...**

 **If I were a Roman augur I might say the three young hawks my family keeps noticing in my yard are a sign that this fandom shall survive as they did. It would've been normal for one of them to die since all three rarely survive (or so my mother, who likes reading about animals, says). Seeing _omens_ in simple happenings is childish and old-fashioned... yet I still sort of wish it could mean that the fandom will strongly survive and I, who saw the hawks, would become important to it's survival. **

**That was really weird.**

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This stage of my story begins with my wedding, at age 16, to a young woman named Lucia Flora. She'd taken a liking to me, was my age, and I didn't really care who I married. Anyway, her father was the brother of my powerless step-father Lucius. It was a good enough match.

The exact date of that small, simplified ceremony was on the 24th of Terrianus in 1867. Yes, I got married during one of the most decadent holidays of the year (that being Timewarp Day, upon which we celebrate the accidental discovery of Timewarp travel. The dance came later). It's just second to Saturnalia excitement-wise. This was done because my mother Dulcibella Livia wanted to avoid any attention being brought to her 'bad' child's wedding. In between many wild parties and such there was a simple ceremony. Flora wore a nice suit and I wore an expensive dress. I wasn't allowed to talk during it and nobody really spoke of it later (they were too busy with Timewarp Day parties).

Since Flora was a bit childish I acted as more of a friend to her than wife. Not that she really minded. Once she found out about all the mental illnesses and such she began an affair with a family friend. Later she moved on to a servant who's name I can't recall. This didn't bother me, of course. It was only natural.

Around this time I began researching and writing a mock diary - published as a serial - about a Transylvanian family stranded on Earth. It's still never been finished and when I tried to restart it nobody wanted to read it. At least it _began_ decently enough. One of the character was meant to be pregnant, you know, but I never wrote enough to get to that 'reveal'. Since it was written as a day-by-day diary things went very slowly in the story. Though somehow that writing style later worked for my later novel _Castle(less) Life_. An important fact about the unfinished diary-story was it influenced my brother's famous mission slightly. Science Fiction often comes true, as they say. Though it wasn't really the science that gave inspiration. It wasn't really about science. No... what inspired the mission-planners seems more the fact that the main character was the daughter of two servants brought along on a mission. One of the servants was based on my friend Vita Magenta and the other on her brother Seianus Vitus Riff Raff. They - as you surely know - were on the mission in 1876 TY/1974 EY.

Despite what people said later, though, it was simply a story and a way of giving myself friends. At that point my only proper friend was Magenta, though I was attempting to befriend other people. Those people were the friends of Anya.

Still I loved her. She had a husband, who I'd learned was named Gnaeus, that surely wouldn't like the idea of me being in love with her. Though I couldn't help but smile joyfully every time she walked by the palace. This happened far too often. So, in the hope of properly meeting her, I decided to go slumming. How foolish love makes one!

After befriending her, while pretending to be a commoner like herself, I tried my hardest to not let her know my true feelings. Though eventually I said it by accident. When I was drunk, probably.

"I love you."

Anya blushed nervously at this. "Look, you're nice and all... but I'm happily married!"

If I'd been my brother things would've been different. That lovely young woman would've forgotten her dear Gnaeus in a heartbeat if I'd been Frank (then known as Gaius, I should probably point out). Still, I didn't truly give up. I still hung around the bars they hung around. My wife became worried eventually, though I continued my habit. Having an affair wasn't a crime according to most people. That's what she - and everyone else - assumed was happening. I wish it could've been that simple.

I loved Anya so very much that I didn't realize what a mess I was causing. It was lucky indeed that I wasn't well known to the public, like my brother. For if I had been more recognizable it would've made things _worse_. What happened was a minor scandal. Anya's friends began verbally harassing me whenever we ran into each other. It got so bad that Flora noticed how upset I was. She made me tell her everything. I told her all I could bear to, she exiled me from _our_ bedroom, and I never saw Anya or her friends again.

In the end the only person who understood me was Vita Magenta. She'd suffered because of who she loved, too. Unlike everyone else she actually understood me. Though I respected her extreme faithfulness to her brother and never flirted or abused my position as her employer. _That_ was what my brother did.

Speaking of Frank...

Even at this point he wasn't married. No, too busy hosting many decadent parties. Since he was officially an adult (over 16) our mother couldn't stop him. According to rumor Gaius Cececatus Felix was inspired to become the great historian he became after meeting Frank at one of these parties. I met that man once. He's terribly rude and I had him banished when he mocked my hairstyle (there were many other insults, that was just the last straw).

Anyway, my brother's career as a man - that is, an adult - had begun not long after his career as a monster did. One who, thanks to propaganda and strange charm, was beloved by all. The science projects he. As his power as a celebrity began to outshine that of our Mother's the only sane persons left seemed to be Magenta, her brother, and myself. Because the people loved him they willingly accepted that he was a living God. They also didn't mind his violence. Mother seemed to be in denial somehow. Of course her beloved little son wouldn't ever hurt someone! Which he didn't, sort of. People let him do what he wanted to them and usually enjoyed it (especially if it was sexual). It's unknown whether his victims liked being _killed_ or not. Few living persons can speak to the dead and such questions are considered offensive.

Our mother Dulcibella Livia eventually had the sense to send Frank away. You may have heard that the mission of 1876 TY/1974 EY was because of a science project that needed to be tested in seclusion. Earth is an ideal place for such things because it's climate is already well-documented by us and there are regular expedition to that old place. Though that is true... there _was_ more to it!

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